Scéilín nua agam le hinsint daoibhse- Nua story to tell yiz.

Ah well, but I'm willing to give her time anyway/

riadach wrote:

Ah well, but I'm willing to give her time anyway/

I'm a mother, and everything I say is always wrong But they usually forgive me when they need a lift somewhere

cactus flower wrote:

Perhaps you need to get the empathy passages in the brain exercised a bit 905

Our sexuality, who we fancy, how we interact with friends, the relationships we form, particularly in the late teens and early twenties is quite a lot of what we think and talk about. It must be a pain in the elbow to feel that if you say what you are thinking about these things to the people you're closest to, they might reject you.

I'm sure you're right about how your parents feel about you, and that most parents would be the same.

Whatever about my empathy levels (and I'm just wondering if it's a question of kind or a question of scale), I'd like to point out that, as a person in their early twenties, I think sexuality hasn't quite the dominance you allege. Maybe I'm a slow starter, but I can say that it hardly comes up at all in conversation among my friends in university, never mind family.

905 wrote:

cactus flower wrote:

Perhaps you need to get the empathy passages in the brain exercised a bit 905

Our sexuality, who we fancy, how we interact with friends, the relationships we form, particularly in the late teens and early twenties is quite a lot of what we think and talk about. It must be a pain in the elbow to feel that if you say what you are thinking about these things to the people you're closest to, they might reject you.

I'm sure you're right about how your parents feel about you, and that most parents would be the same.

Whatever about my empathy levels (and I'm just wondering if it's a question of kind or a question of scale), I'd like to point out that, as a person in their early twenties, I think sexuality hasn't quite the dominance you allege. Maybe I'm a slow starter, but I can say that it hardly comes up at all in conversation among my friends in university, never mind family.

I was thinking about this, and I think you are right. I didn't have much deep and meaningful conversation with my parent at all in my late teens and early twenties, in fact the very thought of it would have been an occasion of dread. It was a bit later that establishing a different, more equal, relationship seemed to be the thing.

riadach wrote:

She hasn't yet. Haven't got a chance to meet her yet to be honest, been busy all week.

I see riadach. Would you be thinking of telling her at Sunday dinner? Are you more nervous about this than with your Dad?

905 wrote:

cactus flower wrote:

Perhaps you need to get the empathy passages in the brain exercised a bit 905

Our sexuality, who we fancy, how we interact with friends, the relationships we form, particularly in the late teens and early twenties is quite a lot of what we think and talk about. It must be a pain in the elbow to feel that if you say what you are thinking about these things to the people you're closest to, they might reject you.

I'm sure you're right about how your parents feel about you, and that most parents would be the same.

Whatever about my empathy levels (and I'm just wondering if it's a question of kind or a question of scale), I'd like to point out that, as a person in their early twenties, I think sexuality hasn't quite the dominance you allege. Maybe I'm a slow starter, but I can say that it hardly comes up at all in conversation among my friends in university, never mind family.

That's actually quite true. So many other things of interest and importance are talked and discussed about among friends. Sexuality would be very much just another subject in that milieu.

Told her, didn't go as well as with my dad. She's really shocked. She said some things that comforted me but other things that upset me a bit. I'll need to give it a while to settle in I think.

riadach wrote:

Told her, didn't go as well as with my dad. She's really shocked. She said some things that comforted me but other things that upset me a bit. I'll need to give it a while to settle in I think.

Tis done: very well done, Riadach. Its a starting point. I apologise for the upsetting bits in general on behalf of mothers. We are always getting things wrong. It the good bits that matter.

Its been quite a week for you.

Indeed, well I had built up a momentum in a way, half way up the hill may as well have gone for the summit.

riadach wrote:

Indeed, well I had built up a momentum in a way, half way up the hill may as well have gone for the summit.

riadach wrote:

Indeed, well I had built up a momentum in a way, half way up the hill may as well have gone for the summit.

Fair play to you riadach, it's wonderful that you've done this during the week. It'll get better and better from hereonin. Things might be quite unsettled now, but as time goes by, it'll all calm down and it'll be fine. You're the Man of the Week riadach.

An-fhear. Fair play do do thuismitheoirí go háirithe d`athair. Níor chaill fear an mhisnigh...

An gceapann tú go dtiocfaidh aon athrú ort féin anois ó tharla gur inis tú do do thuismitheoirí? Cén tionchar a bhéas aige ortsa?

Seans go mbadh níos mó muiníne agam asam féin. Is duine sách cotúil mé, agus scaití ní théim sa seans. Ach ní mó bearna baoil ná an bearna baoil a chuaigh mé ann an iarraidh seo, is caithfear go mbeinn níos toilteanaí amhlaidh a dhéanamh amach anseo.

Tá iontas orm chomh sásta agus a airím duit, cineál bródúil fiú, tá mé cinnte nach mise amháin atá ag smaoineamh mar seo. Chuaigh deartháir le cara liom tríd an rud céanna agus cé gur thóg sé tamall ar a mháthair dul i dtaithí air ag an tús chomh luath agus a thosaigh sí ag casadh le daoine ón ngné sin dá shaol d`éirigh sé an-normálta di.

Tá iontas orm chomh sásta agus a airím duit, cineál bródúil fiú, tá mé cinnte nach mise amháin atá ag smaoineamh mar seo. Chuaigh deartháir le cara liom tríd an rud céanna agus cé gur thóg sé tamall ar a mháthair dul i dtaithí air ag an tús chomh luath agus a thosaigh sí ag casadh le daoine ón ngné sin dá shaol d`éirigh sé an-normálta di.

Quote :

Tá iontas orm chomh sásta agus a airím duit, cineál bródúil fiú, tá mé cinnte nach mise amháin atá ag smaoineamh mar seo.

Tá an ceart agat, anmajornartháinig.

Go raibh maith agaibh a chairde. Níor cheap mé go spreagfadh an scéal bród in éinne, ach b'fhéidir nár aithníos cé chomh mór is atá muid inár bpobal anseo anois. Ach caithfear cuimhneamh air go raibh an t-ádh dearg liom, ag tabhairt san áireamh an aois ina bhfuil féin agus an aois ina maireann muidne. Smaoinigh ar mhisneach na ndaoine siúd, a nocht a gclaonta gnéasúla dá dtuistí fiche bliain ó shin, is an méid a d'fhulaing siad dá bharr. Is astu siúd a bhfuil bród agam, murach iad is a ndeachaigh siad tríd, ní bheadh sé leath chomh héasca orm is a bhí. Mo ghraidhin iad.

(Catching up with threads this eve after a while and almost missed this, cos i'm a bit scared of the Irish)

Congratulations Riadach, that was seriously a big thing to do.

Sorry about your mum but am sure that, with time, the situation will ease. Dunno if there is a PFLAG-type organisation in Ireland who could maybe help, though it's probably just a question of time easing the situation.

Very best wishes anyway.